Letters and Friends

Many Lives

Saturday, December 6th, 2025

Sitting on my new couch, purchased to replace the three year old futon which got too stiff and slanted for my old back, I was reading Margaret Atwood’s recent memoir of this name, hard to put down because of 1) its transparent prose style 2) the out-loud laughs its humor continually elicited 3) my love for  her books as they appeared during the 1970’s when we were newcomers to Canada and 4) its references to people I had met (Bev Howard Gibbon) and places I had been or been involved with (North Bay, Camp White Pine) and later, the Northrop Frye archive at the University of Toronto.

But when I came across her mention of an obscure place not in Canada but in Provence, France, where she’d stayed in 1971, I stopped reading and started remembering:

(more…)

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Shane and Candice Wedding

Sunday, July 20th, 2025

Love and Marriage, love and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage

That’s the old song from the play*
We used to sing back in the day,

Remembering an earlier time
When little farms and towns were prime,

Where couples met at church or dance
Familiar spots to find romance.

Since then, we switched our sense of place
The global village became the space

Where modern people first entwine
In the world-wide web, on screen, online.

But some old things remain the same
For our young Candice and her Shane

A community farm, a tie to the land
Co-workers and friends joined in a band,

And in this antique barn just now
The ancient rite of speaking their vow,

The words we witnessed that bind to last
Their lives, their families, their future and past.

A timeless moment, a rock to resist
Amidst the floods of change, to persist.

So, with love in marriage for 58 years
Sustained by that vow, I say, “Cheers!”

*

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Steve Ugelow 1943-2025

Sunday, March 9th, 2025

Thanks Vivian and Judy for forwarding this information.  The fact that it happens to any of us at this age is to be expected, but that it took place two months ago shocked me into recognition of how close what seems far away can actually be.

Though we were never close, I remember Yugie as a sweet boy, and when we me at the Kenas’ reunion, as a sweet man. R.I.P.

Steven

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Friday, July 19th, 2024

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Facing facts

Thursday, July 18th, 2024

I checked in with Peter after our return from Germany and his from Montreal with his granddaughter.  He reported that his several undiagnosed health conditions have him walking with a cane. He mentioned that he’s been thinking about King Lear these days. I was prompted to send him this poem by Johann von Goethe and my effort at translation

An old man is always a King Lear

Whoever embraced or grappled with you

Has long since taken off.

Whoever loved or suffered with you

Is busy elsewhere.

The young are here for themselves.

It would be stupid to protest.

Come on with me old fella.

 

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In Memoriam: Bob Kenas

Sunday, April 24th, 2022

December 1942-March 2022

Dear Bob

Deborah phoned me with word of your death a couple of weeks ago.  Since then, you’ve been more present to me than even during the intense emails we’ve exchanged since the reunion I attended at your home in 1996. I regretfully declined to join any more of them because of the difficulty I’ve always experienced relating to individuals within the framework of the group. With no one was that contradiction between social and individual relationships more pronounced than with you.

Back in Netherland Park your role as the classic alpha male made you seem larger than life and me to almost disappear as the tiny omega called “mousie.” And when the girl I’d been in love with since fourth grade started going with you the annihilation felt complete. (more…)

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